if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize