i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Randomize
