No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
