Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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