The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
