How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
Randomize