I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
I have feelings that need drinking.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Randomize
