i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
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