I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
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