belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
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