I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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