i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
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