My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
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