Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
I have already put on my inside pants.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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