Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
Randomize
