How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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