My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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