Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
