I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
this just has baby written all over it
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Randomize
