That's intense
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
Randomize
