96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
