I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Randomize
