My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize
