You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize