I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
I got inside last night via doggy door
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
Randomize