How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Randomize