Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
Randomize
