I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
Randomize
