He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize