it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
