so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
it glows. i had to have it.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Randomize
