weddingsv make me drug and hornr
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Randomize
