i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
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