No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize