we made out on top of his cat.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
Randomize
