I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
