Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
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