Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
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