It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Randomize
