Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Randomize
