that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize