I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
Randomize
