he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
Randomize
