my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Randomize
