p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
