Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
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