We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
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