I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
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