is your mom at the bar?
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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