Can i not drive my cunt home
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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