you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
Randomize
