i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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