We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
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